Peak Oil - First the Bad News - its the end of 'blockies' and other important mating rituals.

The issue of Peak Oil has joined Global Warming, World Terrorism and the prospect of post post-feminism feminism on the ever expanding 'the world is doomed' list. Unfortunately it won't turn out to be anti-climactic like the y2k bug. Peak Oil will have a major impact on all aspects of our lives and we need more than a world wide gang of computer nerds to fix it. Y2k was never going to be a real problem since the people that had the ability to fix it had the most to lose if the problem wasn't addressed. I mean if you can't get dates with real women and your life consists of internet porn and computer games you are going to get off your butt and take care of anything that could ruin your 'lifestyle'.

Unfortunately Peak Oil is different, it has the potential to impact all of us normal people as well as those in the wonderful world of nerdom. The problem is complex but the upshot is that in the near future oil will become so expensive none of us will be able to afford it. Not only that but all of the oil alternatives proposed so far either have major problems or will require a lot of time to develop. Depending on who you talk to we are either in trouble now or will be very soon. 

Forget the fact that we will all lose our jobs and food will become hideously expensive, think about your car and all the fun you have in it whether its moving or not. It isn't just a way of getting around. A whole culture has grown up around the car, something that never happened in the days of walking or horses (except for maybe the nomadic Mongolians). In particular, the car is a critical part of the mating game. When I was young we used to do 'blockies', driving around inner city blocks looking at, and hopefully chatting to, any young women we saw. How is the next generation going to do this ? You can't do a blockie on foot! Don't be fooled, no one looks good just walking around. It can't compete to the 'coolness' of a guy driving round in 'lowered' V8 van. The fact that 'blockies' were spectacularly unsuccessful in attracting the ladies is irrelevant, it is a critical part of the complex mating dance of the urban man.

The other important thing about a car was the way it went and how it sounded. The money we spent on modifying the cars exhaust so that V8 would rumble as you cruised and roar as you took off. That takes petrol and lots of it. Do you think an electric car is going to rumble?  Maybe someone will record the sound of a big engine and have it as an Mp3 and you can download it mobile ring tone style to play it through the car stereo as you drive around. Will a hydrogen car be able to do burn outs? Maybe some computer nerd will develop a burn out simulation game that you can play on your game console. What about the need for speed? Will you even be able to reach the open road speed limit in an electric car ? Oh God its all going to be so safe. Won't someone please think about the young people and their inner petrol head. 

Even motor cycles the last bastion of middle class rebellion is under threat. If things get bad enough even they will get too expensive to run. We will all end up on scooters - yes scooters! No self respecting outlaw gang is going to ride scooters, think about what would happen to their street cred. I mean even a six footer bearded outlaw isn't going to scare anyone pulling up on a Vespa. Won't someone please think about the self esteem of criminals!

It seems the future doesn't have room for the romance of a muscle car or easy rider motorcycle. Get up from your computer, stop cleaning the house and say goodbye to your family. Spend some quality time with your car or Harley because it looks like bye bye to the 'Broom Broom'.