Jeez we haven't ever had someone actually really want to lodge a complaint ......

er ......  just let us actually create a real complaints page

In the meantime are you sure you're upset .... I mean really upset ..... really!? .......   no one else is ......  

Still waiting huh?  are you sure  you're upset ..... maybe its just you ..... I am sure you are just having a bad day

Look why don't you go away and have a cup of coffee or something ....  

We aren't going to be able to build this complaints page with you staring at us like that!

Look why are you still here ? .... You know that says more about you than us. .... I bet you write ranting letters to the newspapers don't you? ..... thought so!

Great now you've upset Gav ....... Thanks a lot  he has to do a show tonight and now he says he's not sure he can be as creative or funny as normal

I HOPE YOU'RE SATISFIED!!!!